The pun, or paronomasia, is a form of word play which exploits numerous meanings of a statement, allowing it to be understood in multiple ways for an intended humorous or rhetorical effect
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
A rule of grammar: double negatives are a no-no.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway).
Experts say the cost of funerals have risen by 50%, they blame it on the cost of living.
Math teachers have lots of problems.
The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
Seven days without a pun makes one weak.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Thursday August 19, 2020...Quote of the day
I was sent this quote by email today and decided to pass it along.
There is one rule for the industrialist and that is: Make the best quality of goods possible at the lowest cost possible, paying the highest wages possible.
Henry Ford
A PHILOSOPHY THAT BUILT THE MIDDLE CLASS HAS SOMEHOW BEEN FORGOTTEN.
As we outsource our jobs, creating mediocre products for throw away mass consumption at the lowest price possible while paying the lowest wage possible, we destroy the very market we have come to depend on.
The middle class slowly dies and we are left with the “haves” and the “have nots”. The market economy that helped create this country has given way to the capitalist economy which thrives on separation of classes.
There is one rule for the industrialist and that is: Make the best quality of goods possible at the lowest cost possible, paying the highest wages possible.
Henry Ford
A PHILOSOPHY THAT BUILT THE MIDDLE CLASS HAS SOMEHOW BEEN FORGOTTEN.
As we outsource our jobs, creating mediocre products for throw away mass consumption at the lowest price possible while paying the lowest wage possible, we destroy the very market we have come to depend on.
The middle class slowly dies and we are left with the “haves” and the “have nots”. The market economy that helped create this country has given way to the capitalist economy which thrives on separation of classes.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Sunday August 15, 2010...How hot is it?
How hot is it in southern Texas in August? I'm glad you asked.
I just returned from the Rio Grande valley in southern Texas (Down near Brownsville). I had been told that the heat down there is different because it's a “dry” heat – they LIED!
It's so hot the bees sweat.
It's so hot the armadillos are packing their bags and moving north.
It's so hot the surviving cows give powdered milk.
It's HOT! But there is a nice sweltering moist breeze from the ocean that forces you inside most of the day. It's a nice place to visit (in the winter). There are a lot of Winter Texans (who aren't there right now) who know better than to visit in the summertime. You live and you hopefully learn. Without air conditioning, it would really be uncomfortable. As we were returning north we passed just east of Dallas where it was the 13th day in a row over 100 degrees. Our car thermometer hit pockets of heat in certain areas that topped 107 degrees. It was good to get home to our comfortable 95 degrees.
It's so hot the trees are looking for shade.
Hang in there and really appreciate fall.
I just returned from the Rio Grande valley in southern Texas (Down near Brownsville). I had been told that the heat down there is different because it's a “dry” heat – they LIED!
It's so hot the bees sweat.
It's so hot the armadillos are packing their bags and moving north.
It's so hot the surviving cows give powdered milk.
It's HOT! But there is a nice sweltering moist breeze from the ocean that forces you inside most of the day. It's a nice place to visit (in the winter). There are a lot of Winter Texans (who aren't there right now) who know better than to visit in the summertime. You live and you hopefully learn. Without air conditioning, it would really be uncomfortable. As we were returning north we passed just east of Dallas where it was the 13th day in a row over 100 degrees. Our car thermometer hit pockets of heat in certain areas that topped 107 degrees. It was good to get home to our comfortable 95 degrees.
It's so hot the trees are looking for shade.
Hang in there and really appreciate fall.
Tuesday, August 03, 2010
Tuesday, August 3, 2010...Another day, another war
It's starting to play with my mind. I'm remembering the frustration and lost feeling I had when we went to war in Iraq. It's been almost 9 years now since we invaded Afghanistan and we are still fighting over there. It's ramping up more and more and we are losing more and more of our young men in a war that it appears we are not going to win. At this point I'm not sure what we will win if we do win. We will have conquered a country we have no interest in with a population that feels we are invaders. Somehow religion has become involved and the purpose of our being there is becoming lost. I have heard that the Taliban and the Al Queda forces are operating out of Pakistan, so even if we win in Afghanistan they will still be a terrorist force to reckon with. I think back to when Russia with all it's strength couldn't conquer the Afghans and I wonder if we will do the same. I also remember Viet Nam and how we left so much blood behind us when we pulled out without accomplishing anything. Wars are different now and it doesn't seem to be about devastating the country, but rather winning the population to our viewpoint. I don't think that will happen in Afghanistan. I think we don't understand the Muslim faith and the intolerance of the extreme groups. They seem as obstinate as our Ku Klux Klan people here and we don't understand them either. When you're dealing with extremists you can't always reason and rationalize with them.
It goes on and it doesn't feel right any more.
It goes on and it doesn't feel right any more.
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